The Day My Son Became My Teacher

I have been fortunate enough in this life to have had my share of heart break. Yes, I feel this is a very fortunate event in life we all must have. Had I not kept myself within the confounds of my own agony, my own torture within a negative relationship, I would not have known what true love was.

The unconditional kind that leaves you at a stand still, the kind of love that leaves you speechless, the love that calls you mom. I’ve learned some very hard lessons in this life. I’ve learned to be careful what you ask for, and growth is within every good, and bad decision.

I’ve learned what real love looks like.

How unbelievably beautiful real love is, and how in a matter of minutes, true love can be born (literally). If I could have been more tuned in to my inner being, the voice within me that guides my soul to all I desire, I would have told myself to be still and listen.

As women we have children either unexpectedly, some-what prepared or unwillingly in some circumstances. Some of us choose to purposefully bring a child in the world to fill a void, later finding out that voids can never be filled this way. Every avenue of circumstance and choice, blossoms growth and there is no denying in this.

My son is currently teaching me monumental truths about relationships.

If women, including myself, could treat our relationships with our lovers, just as our children treat us, imagine the possibilities. Unconditional love stares us in the face everyday, even all their idiosyncrasies and immature tendencies exude pure love. They tell us we are beautiful, they show their everlasting affection daily, they desire growth from us on both subconscious and conscious levels. And most importantly, they are the mirrors of both our negative and positive traits.

They take in our beliefs without hesitation, they watch our every move and mimic our behaviors with no reservations. They are the greatest teachers we could have ever asked for in this life, and some how, we miss this truth.

Some how we miss the fact that within that tiny human body, is a soul that may in fact, be hundreds of years old. Deep within their core contains unbelievable, dormant knowledge that can be shared with us. They are here for their own growth, their own lessons and triumphs within this journey on earth. There was a contract made before our arrival here, and we all have a role to play with each other.

This time around I happen to be my sons mother. I feel I am here to show him boundaries, among many other things, and he was placed delicately in my life to show me the love I have always deserved and desired. I tell my son almost on a daily basis, the importance of respecting others. I ask him to respect women just as he would want a man to respect his mother.

Then one day I realized, what I was asking of him, I should have seen as my mirror. I must pick a man who treats me as my son does. This is how we learn from our children, this is why we placed them into our lives to grow. We grow by their example of pure, untainted love, and we share the knowledge we have already acquired within this life with them.

We have to be aware of the beliefs and conditions we carry over from our own parents; our own childhood conditioning. If we are willing to observe and listen to the tiny souls we created, we will know how to truly love and be loved.

My son loves how I look, he never bothers with focusing on my sense of style, he tells me when I have a bad attitude, he lets me know when I am wrong, and he never fails to tell me how much he loves me. He would never intentionally hurt me or deceive me in any way. He is honest, forgiving and never tires of my presence. He also carries within him my sensitive, spontaneous, impulsive and intense characteristics. My beautifully made mirror in tiny human form. Such an amazing teaching tool in which contains monumental avenues of growth.

Our differences are evident and so are our similarities. This is our beautiful balance.

From my beautiful six year old son I have learned what I sought after within the soul of a man. The balance of differences and the mirrored image of myself, are both equally important. We are mirrors to all we seek and I became completely awakened and aware of what I wanted.

I became a seeker of my sons love, and that kind of love, is unconditional.

Britt Johnson