Are you celebrated into existence?
Are you seen in pieces or in your complete wholeness by those you feel give you life, inspiration and love?
Are you surrounding yourself with those ready for the intensity you contain within?
Are you too much more often than not enough.
Do they tell you that you are beautiful, that you inspire their true nature to continue to surface? Are you in a relationship that drives you forward instead of allowing you to run in place?
Friendships and lovers should fuel your flames, not suffocate them.
I've learned many lessons in my now 30 years of life.
I have learned what I value in myself and what I seek to achieve outside of me.
I've learned, if you are not celebrated and seen, stop holding your breath and enduring.
We endure too much, for too long by those who can not see us. They are the ones who look in the mirror and can't see their own reflection.
This is not your fault.
We always accept what we feel we are worth, in this present moment of our lives.
Luckily, these moments shift daily and so do you.
We are always worth more than we believe we are.
We should always reach beyond what we thought was good enough.
In life, there is mediocre food, plans and sometimes days.
But, love and connection should never be mediocre.
Love should allow you to breathe heavier, deeper and with slow inhales that are infused with passion.
Love should never make you hold your breath and beg for acceptance, validation or sensuality. Those you crave should crave you in all the same hues.
If I could tell my past self anything it would be this:
You are vibrant, multi-colored hues that not everyone will absorb.
Stop enduring for those who are color blind.
Stop apologizing for your hopeless romantic heart.
Your sexual nature, your desire to spread yourself wide open.
Stop explaining why you fall in love quickly.
Stumble into love as my times as you can. Life feels extraordinary when you allow this.
Stop settling for lovers who taste and inhale what they want from you, then run away.
Friendships built on personal gain, comfort and insecurities.
Let them go.
You will be okay, I promise.
We don't celebrate one another enough. We don't exclaim in admiration our love and appreciation for those who are a witness to our lives.
We don't say enough, I see you.
Past your surface and straight to your core, I see you. You don't need to do anything else besides breathe because that is enough.
Our attachments as humans trip us up. We hold on too tightly to those we should let go of.
We watch as they grab a hold of each leg one by one, trying to drown us with them.
We are no longer seen and celebrated, we are held onto for comfort.
We have become security blankets. And security blankets eventually wear out.
I will no longer be hidden, silenced or kept away from view. Smothered in someone's insecurities. They can keep up with my intensity for life, or let go.
I have decided that I will either be in relationships that celebrate me, or I will walk away and celebrate myself.
I would rather live a life celebrating the world I see alone, rather than living a daily life of mediocre visibility.
I would rather not have love and friendship at all if it wasn't intoxicating, expanding and celebrated into existence.