dropping the bs: CONNECTING through vulnerability

Since the dawn of time, women have been gathering for a million reasons - to birth, to fight for their rights, to party, to educate, to hold sacred space, to celebrate marriage, babies & more.

As our own moon gatherings & retreats have started to gain momentum, I am finding myself surrounded more & more with like-minded women. This has been amazing, but also, I have grown aware at the lack of these powerful connections & exchanges within our daily lives. When women come together in these modern time, it's typically around an occasion - happy hour or hyper-planned events like parties or dinners where this almost always happens,

"SO, HOW ARE YOU?"

"I'm good, soooo busy"

Someone recently touched on this redundant exchange (read it ) that got me thinking, we're ALL busy, life is about constantly shifting & transforming, right? So why aren't we asking our sisters, "how is your heart?" instead of inviting lackluster responses that comfortably shield the inner workings of our heart or struggles. When we drop an agenda to come together in safe spaces, promoting honest conversations, dropping the bullshit (egos, embarrassment, pain or control) the release & connection created might be surprising... & transforming.

vulnerability

Letting this thought fester (my over-analytical Virgo style), I've started to become increasingly aware of these hollow exchanges while embracing the genuine people entering my life & conversations that are so valuable to my soul. Those are the people I have no fear unveiling what is going on in my world at that moment - good, bad or uncertain.

When you realize these connections are powerful & trust in them, you won't have the, "oh shit, did I say too much?" afterthought. If you are asking that to yourself, you should not be sharing your energy, time or space with that person!

When women gather, unveiling their truth through words (& sometimes tears), energy is amplified & the release is undefinable. More so, this behavior starts to integrate into our daily life (not just in our like-minded circles) where you might find doors open a little wider, stalemate relationships time out & opportunities become clearer.

Finding time to gather shouldn't be terribly difficult, only your approach creates difficulty. Here are some ideas on how to get started, whatever your style might be.

1. Let your friends know you'll be holding monthly or bi-monthly groups/gatherings as a check-in with one another. Letting them know this is a time to "get real" is important, you want this to be a safe environment so voicing intentions will organically dissuade anyone that isn't aligned.

2. Rotate gatherings in different friends homes to give each space sacred energy. Create a calming setting that aligns with your circle of friends - light candles, burn incense or diffuse oils, create a playlist, sit on the floor or lie on living room couches. Get comfortable! Saging everyone when they arrive is a great way to clear negative energies.

3. If you don't know where to start, a great place is to pose a question so everyone in the circle can go around & answer, these are all great starting points to go deeper:

"HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT BEING HERE?"
"WHAT IS GOING GOOD IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW?"
"HOW HAS YOUR HEART BEEN THIS MONTH/WEEK?

4. After the first round of questions, you might ask how everyone is feeling - it might be surprising how slowly opening the heart might surface unseen emotions. This is a good thing! Tears provide release, touch becomes a cloak of strength & a kind gaze is worth a million words. If your group is comfortable to move further, ask whatever might arise in your mind (or another person in the circle), this will evolve naturally. Some ideas:

"WHAT ARE YOU WANTING TO RELEASE THIS MONTH?"
"ARE YOU STRUGGLING WITH ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?"
"WHAT INTENTIONS WOULD YOU LIKE TO SET?"

5. Once you're ready to close the circle, try a 5 minute meditation (there are lots of great guided mediation apps), a short yoga flow or hold hands to literally feel the energy you've created. Close with last thoughts, a glass of wine, shimmy or hugs. Do what feels right.

If the thought of this seems uncomfortable, ask yourself why. It's the only way to get real with yourself. Do you have "surface" friends that you can't be real with? Do you have things you're nervous to release? Have you had your own vulnerability backfire? These answers speak volumes as to where you are & what you need to shed to embrace vulnerability. I promise, it's the most freeing feeling.

If you ever need ideas on how do amplify this within your circle, we want to support your efforts! Drop us an email at YouAreVenus@gmail.com. Want to join our gatherings? Check our schedule out here.

Thoughts by Bethany